Wee Scottish Diaries by Cate

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Why Is My Cat So Weird?

Dear Diary,

Cats are weirdos.

Some of their behaviour will forever remain a mystery.

And no, your cat isn’t broken.

There simply is no human explanation for why they act like that. That’s just cats.

And that’s exactly what makes them so lovable, right?

So, here are my top 3 of the most bizarre things Jamie does on a regular basis.

Cat Zoomies

Zoomies are the absolute weirdest thing I’ve ever seen. And cats do it a lot.

They happen at random times, without any prior notice. One moment your cat sits there, peacefully. The other they go nuts, like a lunatic. For no obvious reason.

And when I say nuts, I mean from 0 to 100. Top speed. As if a switch has flipped inside them.

Running frantically back and forth the entire flat, up and down furniture. Smashing into walls, windows, doors. And their humans - run for your life if you can …

These short episodes fulfil one main reason - to get the energy out. It’s like an internal explosion of excessive energy.

They just can’t hold it back any longer.

I guess we all can relate to that somehow even as humans.

One way to prevent Zoomies at inhuman hours is to make sure your cat is tired out properly. So that there is literally no energy left to burst until the morning.

This can only mean one thing: it’s playtime!

Tossing Stuff Off Tables

I like to call it the ultimate cat’s gravity test. Or let’s watch it fall to the floor.

Jamie loves to knock off things from the table, the kitchen counter, the nightstand, the shelf. You name it.

This can sometimes be annoying for cat owners. Yes, things do break. Though, it can also be utterly joyful to observe.

The moment he pushes it over the edge. You get all the excitement and thrill in his eyes.

The milliseconds it takes to hit the ground, followed by his watchful glace.

Finished off with this totally innocent look of “wow, that actually fell down. I didn't expect that. Oh and before you ask - nope, wasn’t me.”

And if you’re lucky and there is more on the table. You might even get a second round straight after. He just can’t get enough of it.

Believe me, it’s hilarious.

So, why do cats do that? Well, you might translate it as attention-seeking or simple curiosity.

#CatSquare

Put anything squarely on the floor, like a sheet of paper or a book. Now, wait for a couple of minutes.

And before you know it, you’ll find your cat sitting on it.

Cats just can’t resist the #CatSquare. It’s like they’re magically drawn to it. Squares make them completely powerless.

You might think there is no obvious reason for this kind of behaviour.

But … we all know that cats love to squeeze into tiny places. It makes them feel safer and secure.

They’re inside-the-box thinkers.

You could therefore argue that this square might just represent something like a virtual box that has the same effect as an actual one. I mean, why not?


To finish off, I had to share this video of Jamie being weird. I call it the ‘Joystick Cat’.